Tuesday, December 11, 2007

No Movies For Old Men

Remember that segment from Twilight Zone: The Movie where a bunch of geriatrics in an old folks home are transformed back into children by a mysterious visitor? That's a dream of youth some people may be having.

You're travelling through another dimension. A dimension, not only of sight and sound, but of mind. A journey into a wondrous land whose boundaries are that of imagination. Next stop, you find yourself face-to-face with the poster of a new Rambo movie at the local cinema.


Sylvester Stallone may be trying to relive his youth, judging from how he's revived his old franchises, first with Rocky, and now with Rambo. Either that, or he's come to realise that after a long while without a hit, it might be a good idea to fall back on his old money-spinners, no matter how ridiculous the flab may look or how silly it can get having your grandfather toting a machine-gun and blasting away terrorists.

And from the looks of the trailer, it seems Grandpa Rambo may have learnt a thing or two about the current state of the world and how to update himself. It's hilariously ultra-violent!

And then, old man Indiana, too, is getting back into the act. The incongruously titled Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull has the Net abuzz with stills and a poster, and the usual Hollywood hide-and-seek game of keeping the plot top secret. Makes you wonder if the story is that bad, that they have to keep it under wraps lest we hear about it and groan collectively, then decide not to donate our hard-earned cash to the Save The Home For Old Adventurers And Swashbucklers Fund.

And let's not forget, the Indiana Jones films had rather racist views of Arabs (Raiders Of The Lost Ark) and Asians (Temple Of Doom). In his book, A Cinema Of Loneliness, Robert Kolker points out:

"One must recall that (Raiders) appeared at the high point of anti-Middle East feeling in the United States, just after the Iranian hostage situation and at the beginning of the Reagan regime. Even though Indiana has an Egyptian friend and protector in the character of Sallah ... the Arabs are seen mostly as cunning, swarming, somewhat dim-witted tools of the Nazis and victims of the hero's physical prowess."

So it makes you wonder, in these times of Bush, Iraq and terrorism, what interesting things you'll find in the new Indy film.

What it makes me wonder is, who else is going to stage a comeback?

John Travolta has had his comeback in Pulp Fiction, but what if he decides to revisit his old launching pad? Let's call it Saturday Night Rheumatism, and here's a synopsis:

"Tony Manero, now owner of a paint store, is reminded of his glory days as the hottest disco dancer in town. When he spots a poster announcing a Retro 70s Disco Party at a popular club, he decides to don his once-famous black-and-white suit and give it one more try at winning a competition. Unfortunately, a cold front hits Brooklyn, and Tony has to battle his biggest adversary yet - rheumatism!"

Any interested producers? Hmm?

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